Tips to Get Through the Holiday Season (and other stressful times)
Every Holiday season we receive messages to slow down and enjoy ourselves, to be happy, healthy and light! It’s supposed to be the most wonderful time of year and yet many of us struggle and feel overwhelmed by what the holiday season can bring. Stressors like financial difficulties, challenging family dynamics, or feelings of grief and loneliness can make this time of year hard to navigate. It is helpful to have a “tool kit” to rely on when things get tough. Below you will find a list of skills that might be helpful for you to use.
Be Mindful of Your Inner Critic.
During the holidays our inner critic often turns up the volume and the mean voice in our heads gets louder. Check in with yourself. How is being cruel and beating yourself up helping you to feel better? Ask yourself, would speak to your friends and loved ones that way? Better yet, would you talk to a child that way? When we are unkind to ourselves we are unkind to our inner child. Work on noticing the mean voice, challenging it and replacing it with something compassionate like “it’s okay that the holidays are hard,” “I know you are trying your best,” “your best is allowed to look different every day,” and “My feelings are valid.”
Set Boundaries With Yourself.
A lot of expectations are put on us during the holidays and it can feel debilitating to meet them. Along with being kind to yourself be aware of yourself. If the idea of going to that holiday party stresses you out more than it excites you, it might help to set a boundary with yourself. That can look like deciding to stay home, setting a time limit on how long you want to stay at the party or checking in with your feelings throughout the evening and make a game time decision about what you want to do. It is okay to say no sometimes!
Don’t Forget To Breathe!
Our breath is powerful! It connects our minds to our bodies. When we are emotionally stressed, so is our bodies. Slowing down and taking deep breaths, fully expanding your lungs and gently releasing your breath can be a helpful way to regulate your emotions. Deep breathing can be very helpful in telling our bodies that we are safe and can aid us in emotional regulation. When our bodies feel safe our minds will often start to feel safe too.
Journal.
When we are overwhelmed it can feel like we are about to burst. Our emotions feel like they are in control of us and that they have no where to go but out through yelling at your parents or bursting into tears at inopportune moments. Having a place to put down your thoughts and feelings is a gift you can give to yourself. There is a catharsis in releasing your feelings onto the page and giving brain a break from them. Your journal doesn’t have to make sense, it can be a stream of consciousness, bullet points, drawings or scribbles. Your journal is yours.
Seek Out Support.
Sometimes holiday stressors are too much to handle on our own and that is completely okay and normal. When seeking support from our friends and loved ones isn’t enough or available to us, seeking a little extra help from therapy is a great place to start. If you’d like to learn more about how therapy can help you through the stress of the holiday season please reach out to me at gisele@giseleliakostherapy.com